I've had writer's block for a little bit lately and this poem has come out of no where. My usual topic, but it's my specialty. Hope someone reads it :) especially considering it's one of my more rare, optimistic pieces.

Nichole


Waiting for Fate
June 19, 2002
Nichole Falcone

" Hello? Are you out there?"
The words, uplifted by the wind,
Taken in stride with the workings,
Of the world;
Along the ocean current,
Over Colorado rocky mountains,
Scattered like a child' s laugh,
Across our world called " Earth" .
She dares to wonder,
If it lands,
Does it get lost in desert,
Or even ocean sand?
Or does it bounce along mountains,
And travel through cliffs,
Ever in motion;
Like Newton' s First,
She wonders, will it be caught?
Walking along Philadelphia roads,
Center City, beautiful in the sun.
Sees a man in a coffee store. . . no, not the one,
A man in the elevator up to work. . . no, not the one.
Another passes by the cubicle. . . cute smile, but:
No, not the one.
Eight months, many days,
Since she last knew a kiss,
Kisses are bliss if they are strong,
Waiting starts to feel so long,
So she asks, again,
Looking through the window to the stars:
Dots of burning fire in the sky,
Like them,
Love feels so far away.
She stares and dreams,
Wondering " why, "
Wondering " who, "
" Hello? Can you hear me?
Who are you? "

This is really good. i enjoyed a lot of the images you uesed. I like the way your words travel through all these images. i though it was a really great idea. really well done nichole :)

Jeez Paul, gut steal everything that I wanted to say . . . hehe! But anyway, I agree totally, the imagery is beautiful and the concept is amazing. Great piece here Nichole!

lol youve been stealing my lines in every poem i get to so now its my turn :D

No, its never your turn, it's always my turn. Me me me me me me! And why arent you on AIM? Don't you like me no more?

Sorry Nichole. Hehe, I'll stop arguing with Paul in your piece now. Hehe. It was really great, once again, I really loved it!

Wow, Nichole, this is beautiful! Imagery is wonderful. Phrasing fits well. Words flow. Makes me think of little wishes blowing on the breeze, from where, to where. Excellent! :D

This is a fantastic poem. You use tons of real world objects, names, things that exist and are popular or well known. The bits of internal rime are great, and the quotations of addressing people are great. A poetic story. I think you would do well to write things like this longer, in poetic form. Short stories and the like.

:) I've never had such flattering responses before. And when I saw it moved to the showcase, I was actually taken aback!


Thank you all, very much.

What a nice thing to find the day before I leave. :) Thank you all very very much.


Yours Humbily,
Nichole

And John, what kind of short stories do you mean? Do you know of any references I can look at to know what you mean (examples)? Any links?

you could do it odysee style, only shorter stories. just tell your ideas in a lymrical fashion.

Like that poem, Seeing Beauty I wrote?



(that's just a bit of it, i think you'll remember it)

and like the poem above?

And I, unfortunately, had to read the novelized version of The Odyssey, but we did dabble in class with the poetry version. But buying the real form would be a good investment anyways.

The poem was pretty good, but I have to call your hand on the subject for your poem. "Waiting for Fate" is not really alliteration. Perhaps you were thinking of internal rhyme, but normally alltiteration has more than 2 words in a row. It is, but not really. Just thought I'd say something. *grins*

The poem was pretty good though. Who put it in the showcase? Just wondering.

Wow, I love this piece. The imagery is fantastic...and because you use every day objects/items it's really easy to relate to. I love the way this is written, fantastic job babe! :D Be proud of it. It definitely deserves to be here in the showcase.