too many dry ashes
like raindrops
gather at my feet.

a dance,
once played upon a broken drum
sank inside
like the carpet on the floor

interlocking the tune
each note-noticed
each beat-beaten
i crawl away
inside the resonance
cluttered between
the disarraying confusion

i wanted this
just like an open sky
dusting the urge to scream
busy
kicking
the demons away
caring nothing
but your eyes

watching me
it's nothing like this.
a crowded underworld
of forceful gods
telling you what to do
when it all falls apart

or was it to bead a quit?
pressing your thumb longer
harder
a distant shade of green
rubbing the rain from my feet.

too many people fall
looking from this window

Visually expressive, I liked how you brought the rain image into different sections. Your use of language in this poem carries your words in leaps and bounds. I particularly like the feel of:

i crawl away
inside the resonance
cluttered between
the disarraying confusion

and the image of the danger potential around the open window, portal like the sky. Well done.

How many people fall? A lot could fall for this great poem.

This was pretty cool. Tis for the book...

no one truly says anything that hasn't been said before...but there are those few that have learned, or maybe just have the feel, to say things in such a way which excites the mind and gives one pause....you have this gift: ))~